THE DARK IN THE SOUL

The closest thing to darkness is to be depressed and lost; so lost though we're walking.

Hello readers, I am Kaylove and I'd like to introduce you to the many sorrowful hearts, deeply lost and currently searching for a way out. Perhaps, you are one of the many bright smiles I see everyday, but if we took just a moment to look into the eyes of the heart, then we'd realize how many lost souls are seeking some way out of their dark enchantment. There are many things I want to write, but I doubt a simple blog will do the total justice.

Why it took my "imperfect heart" about four years to get over the so called trauma; I don't know, but here's what I'm hoping to achieve here for someone: that it won't take another beautiful heart so long to get up on out of that state of darkness.

Here's the tricky thing about this, we look just the same way we've been looking for the past five years, day in, day out, living deeply within the cocoon of our well crafted sadness. Unbelievable achievements we'd imagined at the age of 10, and here we are; a reckless failure battling with the imaginations of our "supposed to be success." You want it, you pursue it; you have it and you see someone else's, but then you want even more. We all battle the power of insecurities, wanting to be something we don't even understand. Some of us have created models that deal with us daily, and then we die a little more. What is life, if it so full of chaotic confusion? Peace is far gone and we're being tossed and tormented between what we should be and what we've been told to be.

The Emotion, in my opinion is the most fragile embodiment of the human nature, yet so powerful. Such that a simple word can destroy one's orientation. Why is it so important to plant positive words into children while they're growing up? The worst thing is to then think that those positive words should stop brewing at puberty and then we can allow and feed our minds with the dirtiness and junks we pick up everyday. Such minds wound up confused, taking the fragments and pieces they'd learned from peers and hoping there's an atom of truth and a way to be made.

Why do we need counselors and a rehabilitation forum? As far as I'm concerned, there are many broken people in this world, searching for the right kind of words to mend them.

The sad part though is to be 'awarely' unaware of the disease itself. We know, yet we don't. We know, yet we deny it. We know, but we are totally lost on how to find help. Well, thank God for the likes of Dr Phil (lol). We know, but we are too ashamed to talk about it. We hide under our shadow of success, hoping to find someone that will hide us some more. Many people end up a little lesser than they're supposed to give to their world.

Oh, did I tell you the perfect trait for such darkness: run and run, till there's no running left to do. It takes a Spirit stronger to acknowledge and want to be free. It takes another self encouragement like those you got from parents and school teachers praising you to succeed. It takes a conscious effort to confront that memory with newer ones. 

So, how well is your heart, soul and spirit? How well do we pay attention to these hidden parts that contribute majorly to our persona? I have come to realize in my moments of depression and healing that the way to be a victor; is to be punched and punched again but not giving up on the possibilities of being super punched again. When we give up, we stop living in the light and we're back in strange darkness. Hiding away until our frail bodies are done been used up here. I'm not sure we want that.

Peace and tranquility awaits only if we choose to be free. Our choices are powerful and quintessential to our soul.

Who is that next person to you, building up your soul with sour words or power words? Your choice!

As for me, I am taking life one step at a time. Coming to accept that life is far from what I'd thought it to be, planned it to be and want it to be. I am resolute to live in the awareness of light, encouraging others to do the same to the best of their available souls. Life is beautiful when you stretch your hands to help the next person to you, help the next person. You'd be amazed how many souls you'd saved.

Live, Love, Laugh always

Kaylove